Permission to Kick Ass

45: Karla Amanda Brown

Episode Summary

To achieve success in your business, you gotta hold on real tight to your goals…or do you? My guest today, Karla Amanda Brown, learned to let go of her plan (with a gentle nudge from a quarter-life crisis and a wise mentor). Creating more space for herself inspired her to design a business to connect people with the support they need. If you've been white knuckling your entrepreneurial journey, this one’s for you.

Episode Notes

Amongst the goal-digging, hustle-and-grind entrepreneur culture, there’s some sage advice you don’t hear too often: take time to chill the F out. Karla is on a mission with her business to make rest a more common part of her life (not to mention her employees, and their clients). Now that’s a mission I can get behind! Listen now to shift your perspective to make your business work around your life. 

Can’t-Miss Moments From This Episode:

This one is jam-packed full of advice. Don’t miss out - listen now!

Karla’s Bio:

Present... Notices everything... Zen...

These are ways people tend to describe Karla Amanda Brown. As the daughter of a preschool teacher and the youngest of 4 daughters, Karla had a lot to observe around her and the encouragement of her caregiver to do so. These early experiences and desire for people around her to live long, joy-filled lives has led Karla to down the path towards heart-based leadership. 

As a student-for-life and an aspiring heart-based leader, Karla works daily as a psychotherapist, yoga teacher, employer and partner to organize life in a way that reduces friction, disconnection and unnecessary stress. Karla holds closely the value of collective healing in all aspects of her life as she believes unity is a necessary ingredient for liberation for all and especially her Black and Brown brothers and sisters around the world. None of us are free until all of us are free. 

Come hang out with my on Instagram @SoulCentricCollective or Telegram @soulcentric. Together, we can plan to liberate the world!

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Episode Transcription

Angie Colee (00:02):

Welcome to Permission to Kick Ass. A podcast about leaving self-doubt in the dust, punching fear in the face and taking bold action toward your biggest dreams. I'm Angie Colee, and let's get to it. Hey and welcome back to Permission to Kick Ass. With me today is my new friend, Karla Brown, say hi.

Karla Brown (00:24):

Hey!

Angie Colee (00:25):

Thank you so much for being on the show. Tell us a little bit more about you and your business.

Karla Brown (00:30):

So, as you said, I'm Karla and I've got a couple of businesses and one is called Soul Centric Counseling. And we do counseling. Um, there are about 10 of us on 11 of us on staff. And, um, we're primarily based in Northern California, but what's the joy of the internet. We see people throughout the state and I also run Soul Centric Collective, which is a platform that's available to clinicians, coaches, anyone who invites people to gather throughout the world to list their groups and, uh, even offerings for people to better locate them.

Angie Colee (01:19):

Oh, that's cool. And that's such a necessary service. I can't tell you how many times I've been looking for like a retreat or something. And I don't even know where to start like a Google search retreat. No, I didn't want a yoga retreat. I wanted something else, but I don't know how to articulate it.

Karla Brown (01:33):

Absolutely. And so that's the one of the places for that. And I'm curious, what kind of retreat would you want?

Angie Colee (01:42):

I kind of, well, actually I want a little bit of both. If I were to create my perfect retreat, it would be some sort of combination of like adult day camp and doing work on your business. Like I could imagine Zorbing, which if you're not familiar, zorbing is putting yourself into a plastic bubble and flinging yourself down a hill. I could imagine like zorbing in the morning and then like a fancy food pairing in the evening. And then the next day we work on our businesses for a while and then go on an adventure, like,

Karla Brown (02:12):

Oh, I have someone to connect you with.

Angie Colee (02:15):

Oh yes, I will take all of them. We're going to make zorbing retreat happen. I keep joking about it on the show. Now it has to be a thing.

Karla Brown (02:22):

I'm ready. I'm ready to sign up.

Angie Colee (02:25):

Well, we were talking a little bit about the show about this idea of stepping stones. Cause I know a lot of people that are starting their businesses kind of trip up on the, what do I do part? Cause it feels like that's the, that's the key. If I don't figure out what I do, I'm either going to be stuck or like if I pick the wrong thing, I'm never going to achieve the goals. So let's talk a little bit, let's dive into that a little bit deeper stepping stones on the path.

Karla Brown (02:50):

Absolutely. Um, well I guess I'll say right now I'm at a transition point from one stepping stone to another and actually I've got a few to choose from. Like I'm not sure like where I'm going to go next or am I going to straddle a few? Which one am I going to dig into for the next, however long God wants me to, to stay there and do the thing. Um, but I want to tell a story from handful of years ago, I was having a quarter-life crisis and looking for a job anywhere, many miles away from where I was, I just needed to go. And I had in mind, okay, keep in mind again. Quarter-life crisis. I'm thinking, what am I going to do for the rest of my life? I've done applying to jobs, some of which I couldn't even afford to get to the interviews for, but I'm applying all over the place, hoping and praying that I would get something and tripped up on. I have to think positive thoughts. I have to think positive thoughts or else I won't get the job. And I basically had a breakdown in my like, uh, spiritual, positive bypass state and just trying to run at the same time to figure out this thing that I'm going to do for the rest of my life. It was absolutely ridiculous. Um, and thankfully I had a mentor in my life who I could call and have this breakdown with and have her say, okay, Karla, breathe.

Angie Colee (04:42):

We all need somebody in our life that can say that. Just breathe.

Karla Brown (04:45):

Exactly for you with let's start with basics and give yourself an opportunity to like, have your freak out it's life. It's real. And why are you trying to figure out what you're going to do for the rest of your life? How about you look at the next year or two years, move from one stone to the next. And when you get there, especially since you're moving, then figure out the next piece. And so that was huge. It was monumental for me, who had been such a planner and, um, pushed to plan and to say a thing and do a particular thing and make that happen. So to be able to have some freedom and this idea of taking life in shorter chunks was really useful.

Angie Colee (05:44):

I love that. And you said I've been making notes while you were talking, cause you said a couple things that I really want to spotlight. One was this concept of toxic positivity. You didn't use those words, but I'm going to go ahead and slap that label on there because I I've fallen into that trap to myself of like, if I'm not thinking positive, can I even achieve this thing? But then what really happens is you wind up and this is my amateur hour diagnosis of what happened in my own head. So y'all are going to have to be understanding with me real quick, but the way I see it was I'd have my freak out and go, no, that's bad. Stop that, put on a happy face. And then as I'm bearing feelings, I'm kind of putting them under pressure. And then in a moment of weakness or stress, they all just come boiling out. Like I like to imagine, um, if you've seen those videos of a pressure cooker, literally exploding and like the stove explodes and shatters inward and the lid is buried in the ceiling and this thing has just completely blown to bits. That's what happens to me when I bury my feelings and I don't actually let myself freak out. So now I have a trick and I don't know if this is acceptable in a therapy or counseling circles, but set a timer. And during the 15 minute freak out, which I like to call it, I can say, or do whatever I want spiral as deep as I want to go. And then when the 15 minutes are over, it's time to get to work.

Karla Brown (07:03):

Yeah. Well, that's exactly what she told me. She said, give yourself time, do that thing and then move on.

Angie Colee (07:15):

And then if it like, and that's not to clarify for anybody listening, I'm not saying you only have 15 minutes to freak out. Like I'm giving myself 15 minutes to freak out right now. And then I'm going to go do the work. And the, and you'll find that that kind of dulls the intensity of the feelings that you've processed them, let them pass through your body. Cause like, I'm, I get those physical sensations in my body too, when I'm like super stressed that the shoulders wind up around my ears. Um, I'm saying that this is the freak out that we're focused on right now. Kind of like you said, in the future, there's probably going to be another one at which point I will set another 15 minute timer and freak out again and then get back to work. And that's how we pull ourselves forward through all of the freak outs.

Karla Brown (07:53):

Absolutely. Keep your freak out timer handy.

Angie Colee (07:57):

Yep. I think one of the biggest surprises that some of my guests have had is probably because of my digital persona. Like if you don't know me personally, you don't know that I have a very deep anxiety streak and like tendency to catastrophize. I have literally connected prospecting for my business and sending letters out to nuclear winter. And I had like, step-by-step mapped out, totally made logical sense. And then I realized I was being ridiculous, but you know, like anxiety is such an easy thing to cover up with kind of a, a brave face and just the tasks that need to be done. And so then I think people that are looking at a business person who appears to be successful from the outside are just like, they have their shit together and I don't. Is that your experience?

Karla Brown (08:41):

Oh yeah. Yeah. People look at me and exactly what you just said. And I'm like, you don't see me when I'm at home at night or when can finally settle more into my me and in my like super comfort zone because I'm a therapist and a business owner employer. I hold a lot of space for people which requires a lot of masculine energy. And, and I'm talking masculine just from a, from a standpoint of structure and, and holding in that way. And then there, I need my partner. I need my therapist. I need whoever my friends and my people are to hold space for me so I can settle more into softness and my feminine. And so it's interesting like how we live in these two multiple ways and people see a particular thing and think that that's it and it's not it. And so I'm really happy that we're having this discussion to be like, there's so much going on here.

Angie Colee (09:54):

And I think that's the funniest thing too, because as I've started to speak out more and build more of a platform and like share my thoughts, just like we're doing now, I'm discovering this idea of, there are multiple images of me out there and I didn't consciously choose to create any of them, but it's just based on this one tiny slice that somebody saw of me at a particular time that gave them an impression of who I am. And that that's interesting to me because I've been able to think about how I process that from the other side. Right. If somebody is making a judgment of me, it's probably because they only saw this tiny little piece of who they think I am and they don't know the whole picture. So I'm okay with letting go of that criticism. That's really helped me in some senses.

Karla Brown (10:38):

Letting go. And even what you're saying right now, what I'm hearing is like one person having that view because 10 other people will look at that same whatever and have a totally different view as well. And so it's like, there's multiple truths going on here.

Angie Colee (10:59):

Yes. I love that. Like the truth is based on your perspective. And I don't know if this is true for all of humanity, but I suspect it is that we tend to value. I don't want to say value, but I think you get what I'm going for. Like, we put more weight on the negative stuff than we do on the positive. So those 10 people over there that had a glowing opinion of me, I'm like, well, what about this guy that hates me?

Karla Brown (11:23):

No, for sure. For sure.

Angie Colee (11:26):

I really like to refocus on, okay. But these people over here, like me and I really care more about what they think then that lone neuron over there, miss firings. And, um, there was another thing that you said that I really, it kind of stuck in my head, like coming up with the perfect plan. Cause I don't think that you're alone with that by a long shot. I know that I had like, not only the perfect plan for like the next five years, but also the backup plan and the backup backup plan and the backup to the backup backup. And like we just kept going and I wound up spending way more time planning than I ever did actually doing anything. What you said that you spoke to your mentor? Is that how that you got yourself out of that habit of the perfect plan?

Karla Brown (12:12):

I wouldn't say that I've gotten myself out of it.

Angie Colee (12:19):

It's an ongoing challeng.

Karla Brown (12:19):

Right, right. There are times when I'm less plagued by it. For sure. And those times happen when I'm largely, when I'm taking care of myself, kind of like right now, I have been away on a retreat and decided to stay away to rest and integrate and to chill the F out. Um, and so it's when I have moments like this, which I'm planning to make to not the perfect plan, but I'm planning to make more, a part of my life integrating more chill, more rest. Um, because I don't believe that it should just be isolated to one to two times a year. I want more of this and not only do I want more of it for me, I want more of it for my employees. I want more of it for our clients. I want more of it for the clinicians who are putting their offerings up on Soul Centric Collective. I want more of it for the world. This like do, do, do craziness that we're living in it's, it's, it's too much. It's too much. And I'm ready to be a part more, a part of changing how we do life.

Angie Colee (13:35):

Absolutely. I'm, I'm signing up for this mission I am in for this fight. Totally. I know they can't see the video where over here, both like doing happy dances, like we're going to do this. Like, I'm so tired of this hustle and grind culture that we live in that says that you literally have to kill yourself, heart attacks, stress ulcers, like all of these physical health ailments, just to meet some arbitrary definition of success. And then when you get there, you find that you don't even like it anyway. Cause that was somebody else told you that you had to make a hundred thousand dollars a year or you had to be a seven figure business. Otherwise everybody's miserable. And it's like, the aha moment for me was I could have any kind of business that I want to, but I have to decide what I want first and then figure out how to make that happen. So I've literally, and I didn't really understand that until I met people that works differently from me because I worked in Silicon Valley for awhile. Do you know Orchard Supply Hardware?

Karla Brown (14:31):

Oh yeah.

Angie Colee (14:32):

I definitely did some hustle and grind at corporate offices there before it was all shut down like 12 to 14 hour days. It was crazy. Um, and I just, I don't understand how that leads to better work. Like you have to give your all to this work. You don't like the work is never going to be done. And that's a good thing,

Karla Brown (14:53):

It is a good thing because, well, it's really interesting. Um, I'm just thinking about innovation and, and creativity and we need to step away and to see different things, to be able to innovate and change and move with the world. Sounds like something that Orchard wasn't able to do. So, um, that grind that we are largely in and told to be in by whoever it's not working very well.

Angie Colee (15:27):

No, it's not. And I, you know, I'm a pretty creative person by nature and I've found that, you know, when I was in a corporate office like that, and I'm expected to have my butt in a chair, whether I'm producing or not, it's taking me days to come up with a campaign and to write all of the assets. Whereas if I can do more and I've purposely designed, it's not easy to get to this stage, but I've purposely designed it to where I get up in the morning. And I have like two to three hours just to myself to do whatever, stare out the window, have coffee, whatever. That's how I process and I get ready for the day. And then I work in those timer chunks. I use that time for everything. I live by the timer in the calendar. Um, and I, and I set a goal for this 30 minutes. I'm going to do that. And I can bang out in 30 minutes what it used to take me days to do, just because I was resisting that space. Like, I didn't think I had the space. So I dunno if my mind was just like, all right, well, whatever I'm done, I quit. And let me rest

Karla Brown (16:25):

Exactly. Our, our minds fill up our bodies, like take on a lot and it's too much. We need to be able to let stuff go.

Angie Colee (16:36):

Yeah. I find that interesting too, because especially for, for new freelancers, they're still really attached to this dollars for hours mentality that I think a lot of new entrepreneurs have. And it's, it makes sense because that's how we earn. That's how we value ourselves as employees. Like I get a certain number of dollars for this hour that I've put in. Um, and then as I've gone out on my own and realized that that 30 minutes that I spent writing that campaign, that campaign made $500,000. Did it really matter that I spent 30 minutes on it instead of three days? I don't think it did. So like, I really, like I said, I'm on this fight to like disconnect the time that you're spending on something from the value you think you add. No!

Karla Brown (17:19):

For sure. It's such a transition that I recognize I'm still in, I'm at a different phase than I was a couple years ago, or I'm sure even six months ago, but recognizing like, oh, okay, right now, for instance, this time, while I'm away to decompress to let go, that's going to be beneficial. Because when I emerge back home with my clients, with my employees, I'll be more rejuvenated. I'll be more available, I'll be less cranky. I will be able to better process with them and be more spontaneous and creative and have more space to shift my life and do different things that, that I wasn't able to do before, or I'll take even, um, as, as awful as like COVID as a virus has been like the opportunity that it provided for me to see that life could be different was invaluable because I was so stuck in here's how life is working and it's good and creating my own rigidity, even though I was a business owner, but like thinking that it needs to be set up in some box and then all of that got blown out of the water and I'm like, oh, no, things can be different and it can work really well. Oh, all right. I'm ready to change some things.

Angie Colee (18:53):

Absolutely. I think, you know, I can't, I can't ever say that I'm glad a pandemic happened, but I'm glad that there were some good outcomes from such a devastating global tragedy and chief among them, especially in the states, this idea that 40 hours a week is the worth that you have to add to this nation, to your family. Like, no, you don't have to put in 40 hours of work. Do you do something that somebody else values? Can you help another person? I think that's all the value that you really need to be able to add. Can you contribute? Can you love, can you inspire someone? Can you pick up a piece of trash that you see on the way to the trash can like little things really add up and it doesn't have to be about hours and money. Um, and how often you sit on your ass at a desk. I, let me tell you all the hours that I spent at the desk, I still only worked for two or three, probably goofing off the rest of the time. So I might as well figure out how to work two to three hour days and then go goof off. Like I'm already going to do, you know?

Karla Brown (19:53):

Three stars to that. Absolutely. And make a bigger impact in the world

Angie Colee (20:01):

By giving myself that space to think too. Like that was another thing that I wrote a piece recently talking about how I came to that morning routine that I mentioned, you know, two to three hours of basically just doing nothing and having coffee. And I sit outside a lot and I write in my little tablet and they usually have some sort of like Ella Fitzgerald jazz radio going and just love to wake up and decompress. And it sounds weird to say like, I want to wake up and relax, but I do. I just like a slow start to my day. And often I'll write out half of the things I need to get done just in those morning pages over coffee, because I'm so relaxed and I'm taking that time to take care of myself. But I had this thought in my head for a long time about when I would have permission to have, when I get to a certain income level. When I get to a certain business side, I will be able to go do this long indulgent morning routine that I've been dreaming of. And one day it occurred to me like there's no morning routine committee that's come around and be like, boop. And hit me on the head with the magic wand and be like, you are officially ready for the morning routine. So I decided, okay, I'm going to work on this. And it wasn't like I switched a flip switched, and I was able to like do it in morning. It w it was fits and starts. And some days I fell back into old habits and some days I did better now it's largely a new habit that I get up and take my time in the morning. And the rest of the work fits around what I've already decided to do, because that's the space I've given it.

Karla Brown (21:27):

Yeah.

Angie Colee (21:28):

Amazing.

Karla Brown (21:29):

My gosh. That's I'm to feel so inspired by you to, um, be at that phase of, of living life and, and your work moves around your life.

Angie Colee (21:45):

Like we've let kind of the, the cultural narrative, like the overall message. That's just kind of floating out there in media and society and stuff. Tell us that we have to work. We have to be productive, but it's just as productive. Like I said, to be kind of chill and design the way you want to relax and engage and interact with the world and produce things as it is to just let people tell you good work, do this, do that, do that. Like now it's taken me a long time to be okay with making my own calls like that though. And kind of rebelling against this idea that I have to work myself into an early grave in order to be valuable.

Karla Brown (22:30):

What do you think could have helped to shorten that timeline?

Angie Colee (22:36):

Hmm. You know, uh, getting involved in entrepreneurial circles sooner on this journey, like as soon as I started realizing that this was the direction I want to go, I fell in with some groups early in my career, but they were definitely the hustle and grind folks. And so like, even when I was working at Orchard Supply Hardware, and I worked in the Bay area there, um, I met a friends who I was jealous of at the time, but I, I was just so curious that it overrode the jealousy and she says, I'm going to tell my boss, I'm going to Spain next month. And I was like, you can, you can do that. Like, you're allowed to do that. She was like, well, yeah, I want to go to Spain. I decided to go to Spain. I hope that he wants to keep working with me, but if he does it okay, totally get it. I need to go to Spain. Um, I'm sorry that it didn't work out and I'll talk to you soon. And they kept working with her and I was just like flabbergasted, because up until I saw somebody doing it differently, that wasn't even a possibility in my mind. Like, I didn't even know that that, it's an alternate reality for all. I know that exists where you can tell someone, this is what I'm planning to do. Are you cool with it? No, you're not cool with it. Okay. I'm going to do it anyway. We part as friends. Have a nice life. LIike you can just set that I don't even want to call it a boundary. I don't think it's a boundary, but just like having that conversation and being totally cool with the outcome regardless, and knowing that you're going to be fine.

Karla Brown (24:03):

Yeah. It, it does take work to get there. And I hear you about having the right community to support you on that journey. And I'm so happy you, you said that like not every entrepreneur is willing wanting to go about it the same. Um, and so it's, it's been incredibly important for me to find people at my speed, like are willing to be with me at my speed. Like, even if they're not there, like, like they can be with me as I am and support me and, and I can support them and learn from them and we can feed off of each other. Um, but that like do everything all the time, even though I'm an entrepreneur, like, no, it's too much. It was, it was, I I've been there. I've been there and it was killing me. And, um, I have like the medical test results to prove it. And I'm like, like this, this isn't working and I want more and I want to do it differently. And so I need to put my self first. Like I need to take better care of my body. Take better care of my mind consistently. And that is going to equal so much more than this nose to the grindstone hustle could equal right now. Like, I, my legacy is already shifted because I've shifted from myself right here and now.

Angie Colee (25:36):

Yes. And that's so important. Like, and this is just kind of a side note. If you're listening and you're thinking about starting a business, or if you're at a point where you're kind of struggling with your business, the right message at the right time for the right person is going to change their life. It could be a book. It could be a quote. It could be a sentence. It could be up on a soap box, doing a rant about something you're passionate about. Like, we're going to break this hustle and grind system. We're going to get you to work on your own terms on your own value. Um, that's going to connect with someone in a real way that changes the entire trajectory of their life. Much like my friend saying, I'm going to Spain. I was like, how do you do that? I actually, I told you I was jealous of her. I went up to her after the fact and was like, so I want to travel. Like you do. And I don't even know where to start. Like the whole idea of travel and work is overwhelming to me. And she goes, okay, well, I think I'm planning a trip to Columbia and a couple of months you want to come. And I was like instantly scared, but like also intrigued. Okay. I'll say yes and see what happens. And then we spent a month in Columbia, in west Columbia, south America, uh, just exploring, uh, trying my best to communicate in my garbled Spanish, uh, saying yes to different adventures and seeing what happens. And I'm glad that I saw a different perspective and that I didn't let envy or those feelings of like, well, she can do that. And I can't stop me from asking how to do that. Like surround yourself with people that show you what's possible. And then, and then ask them how they did it, because they'll probably tell you, and then maybe they'll invite you on an adventure.

Karla Brown (27:11):

Yeah. They probably will tell you, like helping people telling, talking to people, sharing my wisdom, my knowledge, my, I don't know, but contact this person. It's I get so much joy from it. I like it.

Angie Colee (27:28):

Yes. You know, that's funny cause I'm from the south and there's kind of a lot of head trash and unspoken thing about like, we do it ourselves. I don't need any help. I got to do it myself. And that frustrates me to no end, because nobody got anywhere without help. Like, there's that old saying about no, man is an island, which I don't entirely understand, but it seems to me like nobody does it alone, which really resonates because there's been somebody out there nine times out of 10 that has already solved a problem that I'm currently going through. And they have a five minute solution for me that would have taken me the next two months to figure out. And so like, Hey, on the one hand I could be stubborn and maintain my pride and go waste two months over here trying to find a five minute solution. Or it could just go to my really smart friends and say, Hey, here's where I'm struggling. Can you help? And they go, sure. I fix that, go check out this resource. And they get a lot of joy and satisfaction from seeing me succeed from feeling like they saved the day and they got to help me out. Uh, and that they taught me something useful. And I got a lot of joy and satisfaction from not having to spend two months, figuring out this thing I don't know how to do and no longer being stressed about it. And I guess the point of that really long windy rant is, uh, instead of thinking of it, like you're a burden if you ask somebody questions, maybe think of it as you robbed them of the joy of helping you. If you don't speak up and say, this is where I'm struggling. I don't know. That's helped me to ask for help.

Karla Brown (28:58):

I'm with you. Exactly. And I'm really curious about how this culture of lone wolfing life got developed. Like it's not just about business. It's also about life and I'm, and I'm like a recovering lone wolfer.

Angie Colee (29:20):

I totally get it. Especially into like, there's never been a better time to be alive in terms of like technology and convenience. And, you know, you've got anything that you want. If you're listening to me, presumably on the internet somewhere, you could probably order Amazon next day. And like there's so many great advantages where it used to take what better part of weeks to sew your own outfit. And then you have to wear that outfit for weeks and months until it falls apart. And then you mend it versus having a hundred different outfits to choose, choose from it and push a button. And yet what have we done with that reclaimed time? You know, now that we don't have to go out and like grind our own bread or, you know, um, walk four miles to the well to get water or anything like that, we've solved so many of our problems. And yet now that we've got that convenience and that extra time back, we just filled it with more shit.

Karla Brown (30:12):

Right. Shit. Yeah. Stuff. That's um, unless we're really intentional and have people to help keep us to it. Like it's just, it's filled with crap and, um, and largely a lot of it's because we're fed crap and, and we're having, I have found like very intentionally have had to like seek out the gold and, and sift and sift and sift. And it's it's out there. The love is out there. The light is out there. Amazing people doing amazing work is out there. Good news. It's out there. And I won't go into all of the frustrations with why it's so hard to find, but it is, but, but it doesn't mean that it's impossible.

Angie Colee (31:02):

I'm glad that you've mentioned the word sift in particular because I've had a few people that, you know, have, have quit Facebook in a huff and I totally get it. Um, the man I'm with you stand up to Facebook, rah, rah, I'm still on Facebook because it's an easy way to communicate with people. And because over the last four or five years, I've been very militant about filtering out every single thing I do not want to see. And so now my feed is like food and travels and interesting conversations and little baby animals having fun. And like I have curated, I have sifted and filtered my feed until it's exactly what I want to see. And then I go seek out the news. When I want to know what's happening in the world. I go on a long drive and listen to NPR and stay informed about current events without getting all riled up and stressed about everything I can't do anything about. And I think that's important like to go out there and fight for causes to be a force for good in the world. And also not let yourself be crushed by all of the things that you can't possibly accomplish on your own.

Karla Brown (32:06):

Right. I'm speechless. Cause yes. Yes.

Angie Colee (32:12):

We're over here dancing and cheering again. Fantastic. Well, you know, I made a note, um, earlier about, you mentioned that you were straddling two worlds. I want to dig into that a little bit more

Karla Brown (32:22):

And having revealed to me more that I possibly want. It's even hard for me to talk about because it's so new and tender, um, as, okay. So today, before our time together, I was pretty tired, but I'm moving away from caffeine and still on this like yoga retreat hangover, it's the hangover is real. And so I'm like, oh my gosh, okay. Do I rest? Or like, what do I do? And, and I'm here in Encinitas. What a lovely place to be. I don't live here and I have a rental car. So I'm like go to the beach, just go. So I muster up enough energy to like get out of the house really quickly. And I go to the beach in the middle of a Wednesday in the middle of a Wednesday, I'm at the beach with a bunch of school kids surfing. And, and I I'm just there. I didn't do anything. My feet barely even touch the water, but I was just standing in the sand and I'm like, how blessed am I to have this opportunity? And I want more of this. I want to be able to take more trips on an, any day to do whatever I want to do or sit out and do nothing. I want more of this. And so the specifics are, they are what they are. But this piece about wanting more choice with my time is where I'm beginning to move into.

Angie Colee (34:20):

I love that. And we, you know, when we talked about that, it being a choice and I like awareness is the key in the start of that journey. And I think you're at the perfect spot because if you want to spend more random days on the beach, well then articulating, I want to spend more random days on the beach is the first step. And then you go, okay, well, how do I make that happen? I need, well, I need to say no to anything that wants me to work on a Wednesday. There there's one criteria. And then you set those filters, right? And you start to see the opportunities that are going to fit into the world that you want to design. Like I met somebody once. That was fascinating to me, because all he does is like adventure for six months out of the year and then come back. Like he comes out of his shell back online, restarts his business, focuses on hustling and making enough money to float him for the next six month adventure. And then he goes offline again and does more adventuring. And like that's a valid way for somebody to do biz. He decided that that's the way he went. I bet when he comes back from six months offline, he is feeling great about the work. And then when he's done with his six months of work, he is ready to hit the road.

Karla Brown (35:26):

Absolutely. Gosh, I can just only imagine like how, who and what he must be attracting when he's like vibrating from six months of adventure and pressure and joy. Holy crap.

Angie Colee (35:44):

I love it. And you know, I want to point out too, because I don't think joy comes from, uh, binge watching Netflix. Don't get me wrong. I love, I love Netflix. I worked in the TV industry for a while. I thought I was going to make a career out of that, but I don't think that's joy. I think that's entertainment. Joy was being there on that beach going, oh my God, how blessed am I? Joy was last week when I made a major mistake and did a water waterfall hike on the same day that I had to pack to leave my Airbnb. But I'm not talking about packing suitcases. I'm talking about packing everything I own into a car. So it's a little bit of an ordeal when I'm on packing day. Um, but I wouldn't trade the time that I said sat at the base of that waterfall, just in awe of the roar of the water and the mist on my face. And I'm pretty sure I lost an hour and I just sat there and an hour went by and I was like, what just happened to me? But that was joy. That was being in the moment and not kind of losing hours to Netflix, if that makes sense. So like, I want to encourage more joy and more activity and yes, indulge Netflix every once in a while, but go, go to the beach, go to the water, go to the woods, do something. Yeah,

Karla Brown (36:55):

Yeah. Getting out to, to be with the elements

Angie Colee (37:01):

And remembering that it's a great big worlds. Like I know when I'm really super in my feelings and I'm feeling really anxious. It's usually because my world has shrunk down to be about this. Like not much bigger than an Angie shaped world. So everything is life or death. Everything is an enormous problem. And then I go back out into the world and realize that there are so much bigger problems than this. I'm probably not going to remember this particular moment in time, five years from now. So maybe like take it down a notch, maybe go help someone else for a while and get some perspective on what I'm going through. Oh, that's awesome. So this has been so much fun. I could talk to you all day about this, but I'm more interested. We're going to do a follow for sure. Cause I want to hear how this tender new piece develops and how the Wednesday beach day works out for you. So Karla, tell us. Wednesday beach day, we're just going to proclaim it and then it'll happen. Right? Articulate it. Um, tell us more about where to find out about you, about your business, about your journey.

Karla Brown (38:06):

Absolutely. So soulcentriccollective.com. That is the best way to find out. Not only about me, um, I'm on there obviously, but also about people from around the world, doing what they're doing and finding community that that's the mission of Soul Centric Collective finding community, knowing ourselves better and spreading love. And so, um, like I may not be the person to hold space for many of the listeners right now, but I know that there are people out there. And so that's what I want. Soulcentriccollective.com and then we've got social media platforms as well.

Angie Colee (38:53):

Awesome. I'll make sure that they have clickable links in the show notes so that they can find you wherever you happen to be. And no joke. I want to hear more about beach Wednesday.

Karla Brown (39:01):

Yes.

Angie Colee (39:03):

All right. Thank you so much for being on the show and talk soon.

Karla Brown (39:05):

Thanks, Angie

Angie Colee (39:11):

So that is it. Another awesome episode of Permission to Kick Ass on the books. If you want to know more about the show or if you want to know more about me, Angie Colee and the mission I'm on to help entrepreneurs punch fear in the face and do big bold things, then head on over to permissiontokickass.com. That is all one word together, permissiontokickass.com. Make sure to sign up for my email list so that you know whenever there's a hot, fresh and ready podcast episode out for you. And also on Mondays, I like to send out a little newsletter called Kick Monday's Ass. I'm sure you're totally, totally surprised by that. So thank you for being here with me today. I'm Angie Colee. Make sure that you share this with a friend that needs to hear this message today. Like it, share it. Comment wherever you're listening to this today and let's go kick some ass.